Breakroom Bets: Is The Prodigy The Hottest Gambler Alive?

 “Winning is the most important thing in my life, after breathing. Breathing first, winning next.”

- George Steinbrenner

Wise words from The Boss. He knows what it takes to win. What do The Boss and The Prodigy have in common? We both know what it takes to win, and we're both rich. You don't go 6-1 by listening to the nerds, and you damn sure don't go 6-1 without listening to your gut. I'm not going to lie, even I am a bit shocked. And to be real with you, I'm petrified at the thought of this being the season apex. What are the odds the prodigy comes out like Barbaro? (RIP) 

Coming out firing on all cylinders for CFB Week 1 has me juiced up. Texas, Georgia, Miami, ND, and USC all winners that I gave you on Friday. The nerds are furious. The nerds are shedding tears all over their excel spreadsheets and TI-84 calculators. The Prodigy is happy, but humble. Another massive week ahead. 

If you've been following on X you also know I added winners to the card I gave you on Friday. And if you've been following you also know I gave out the Army/Lehigh Under. Obviously that game does not count anymore because the Army coach has a vendetta against the prodigy and decided to keep trying to score up 35-7 on the Lehigh 35 with :40 left. Totally not fishy and totally not bullshit. In solidarity with my brother Will who is serving currently I will not speculate motive. 

Okay, lets get into some weekend awards!

The Joe & Troy Game

The best game of the week. The game so good you could only have hoped it were being announced by Joe Buck and Troy Aikman. The best announcing duo in the business by far. No better feeling than a fall Sunday fading into night, and Joe Buck's voice overtaking the living room as you settle in. 

This game belongs to the one and only Notre Dame. I gave them the Trap game memorial and they took that and shoved it up A&M's ass. Marcus Freeman is starting to grow on me. He's a beast. This game would have been so sick if it were Irish v AM with Joe and Troy on the call. The game, the theatrics, the storyline coming out of it are all great. 

Josh McDaniels Memorial

This award goes out to the biggest boneheaded coaching move over the weekend. This, of course, is in honor of the most narcissistic, dumbass Head Coach in NFL history. The great Josh Mcdaniels. Truly one of a kind in the ranks of terrible coaches and their decisions. Whether it's saying he could turn any JV quarterback into an all-pro, or starting Bryan Hoyer in an NFL game in 2023. I could quite literally go on for hours, but we'll save that for another time. 

A lot of choices to choose from over the weekend. Billy Napier not being able to open a water bottle after an assssss whoopin, Mike Norvell starting 0-2 against non ranked opponents. Hell, I'd even accept Coach Prime for throwing the ball during a burn clock situation because "Shadeur is a good kid". Which is a crazy spin from Prime but I'll let it slide this time. I think Prime will eventually win this award so I don't want to empty to tank too early. 

Brian Kelly has to be the winner. What a giant ass. It's well noted how much of a dink he is, but even he one ups himself every year. As the prodigy predicted this is the third year in a row LSU has lost their opener and it gets funnier every time. This year Kelly's shining moment was one of his players hitting USC with a fake pump shotgun to the dome. Classic celly. Don't even understand how got flagged tbh. Kelly coaches his boys to play the game with honor and respect!

Also, his fake outrage was so good postgame. It looked like a clip out of the office it was that good (or bad) of an acting job. 

Bill Simmons Belt Update 

This award is dedicated to my king Bill Simmons. The Pod father is slowly turning into Billy Chapel, but every now and then he can clear the mechanism and throw a perfect game. 

This award is simply whoever looked the best the prior week is now DeFacto best team in the league, aka the carrier of the belt. Famously given to Anthony Edwards this NBA postseason, who took it from Jokic, and then passed it to Luka, who then fumbled it to... Tatum? I don't know, that's the beauty of the belt. 

This weeks winner is simple. Georgia looked like a freight train out there this week. I knew Dabo's team would get their ass kicked but man that was unholy. Georgia now holds the belt. Tune in next week to see who takes it from them!

TNF Pick!

Ravens @ Chiefs 

Chiefs -3 (-110)

This could be where the wheels fall off The Prodigy train. After a remarkable week 1 I start my week with the devil on my TV screen. Mahomes, Kelce, make me sick. There's two way I can approach this:

1. Do what I did last year - fade the chiefs in any big game. 

2. Finally concede and emotionally hedge. 

Does the Prodigy sound like a quitter to you? 

The Chiefs partied all offseason. Mahomes came into camp looking like he crushed J Mikes and Half Apps all offseason (respect). Kelce is mentally retired, mark my words. He was kind of bad during the regular season last year... just wait until this year when he finally comes down from his partying around week 7. Then we're really in for the demise. 

Ravens are probably going to choke because everyone does against the Chiefs. But give me the Ravens Moneyline baby. 

Prodigy Pick: Ravens ML (+128)

Follow the twitter for live takes. I am ready to get canceled!

-Prodigy 

X: @HotTakeProdigy 

Mailbag: HotTakeProdigy@Gmail.com